I just make my life more complicated.

Which one to choose? My burst and exploding young vein or… A safety net which will be there for me?

I wish..
I wish I don’t have to choose one of them. I wish I can have someone who I really loved, okay maybe not now..
I don’t know.. I just really want that “experience” he offered to me, it feels sparkling than the other net with his close dome life.. Oh Gosh, I don’t know what to do, I really don’t.
I cannot choose.


i have decided to enjoy all the care and affection from him, nonetheless not closing my heart to other guy….

I don’t wanna think too much, just wanna be grateful… God has answered my prayer and I should not reject it as I always been….

long time not write…

Dear Bloggy,

I’m sorry I left you for quite a long time, but I guess that what happened when the blog owner is sort of working on a relationship.

that what happened to my friend, favorite blogger, and most of others who falls in love. we tend to focus on that and left everything else. Other thing feels so unimportant.

No, I am not in love. But, yes, i sort of seeing someone.

2 months ago, I only being polite to him as he’s one of my colleague in my product improvement project.

But I have no idea that my politeness has resulted some sparks in his heart.

he started to use office chat, just to ask some unimportant work things. I know where he wants to go with it, and I respond, because I am lonely.

yes, I prayed to God for a guy, and there he was.

I haven’t like this guy at all. uh, well, he’s sort of good looking, but he’s so cold. I need a funny guy to tame me. I need an easy and young guy to have fun with.

and me, who always thinks a lot…. begin to think about this sparks.

day by day, he act very slowly, slower than any man who ever interested on me. But, then I realize, the more he act so cold, the more I’ve been curious about him.

well, we went on a date, and it doesn’t go so well.

as usual, he’s so cold and quiet.

I never went on a date as quiet as that.

I was tired.

In yahoo messenger, or office chat, we can talk anything (although still with his cold style). He never called me personally. I am confused. We are old enough not to use any passive communication to relate. he should’ve called me, but he never did.

so, we’re having this so-kind-of-ongoing-process through YM and office chat. I feel so sad about that, but I tried to enjoy it.

I don’t know where it’s gonna end, but based on my best friend’s advice: just enjoy it and don’t think too much. and I will.

But I just write this down after he left me in a conversation because he feels so sleepy. I just realized how tired to understand other, especially if we don’t have that much of love for him/ her.

well, i begin to like him, especially when he got push me to use his card, with his best-sleepy-smile. I feel protected 🙂

but, I don’t know until when I can hang-on on this passive relationship.

Oh God, you answer my prayer in a various way, and I still being grateful for your gifts… I will try to enjoy these moments and of course.. not closing any opportunity to another door 🙂

my pic files..

Wanna share you some moments in my life.. cause life is only 2,500 weekends, why not enjoy it? <div class="wp-caption alignnone" style="width: 650px"bowling time.. hillarious! we all dumb in bowling, and tat wat makes it fun :p

bowling time.. hillarious! we all dumb in bowling, and tat wat makes it fun :p

<div class="wp-caption alignnone" style="width: 650px"on my mummy's bday.. with daddy :)

on my mummy’s bday.. with daddy 🙂