I’m sorry

I’m sorry.
I’m sorry ibu paseo that i didn’t follow my heart to buy your tissues. I’m sorry I just smiled at you and left.

I’m sorry mas KFC that I need to cancel my order, because it took you so long to arrive & I’m already super starving. I’m sorry if you ended up buying my order (I hope not).

I know I have been so emotional, bossy, and sometimes mean. I will repay all of my mistake with something good. I will try, God.

Because you have been so nice to me, by giving me healthy parents & spouse, cute daughter, and good job. I don’t know what more to ask.. Thank you God, I will try to be nicer.

Motherhood (almost)

Being a mom takes a loooootttt of hard work. What I mean is a lot, yes more than anything else.
It’s started when the doctor said I’m pregnant. I can’t fit into my jeans, start throwing up 3-5x a day, and don’t wanna do anything including cooking. Then my doctor said I need to drink more, and pee more. So I started to wake up 2-3x at night to pee.

Then it gets better after 5 months, the nausea had disappear. After 7-8 months, my back start hurting me and waking up from bed is such a struggle.

And now, waiting for the baby to come out.. Haha, this is another battle because currently my body is not mine anymore because she’s getting bigger (yes, it’s a girl!) And even 1 minute walk makes my feet swollen & feels like my tummy is going to drop.

So yes, now I understand why all moms want their baby to come out soon!!

However, God is currently teaching me to be patience, since I’m the most impatient girl in the world!!

She will come out, eventually, don’t know when, but in His perfect time..

D-22 before our wedding..

I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with him..
Although the preparation sometimes could be so intense, but he also can be so adorable & made me realize why I chose him.
He walk the talk & trying to be responsible of this preparation.
He made me smile when he said “my soon to be wife” with shyness.
I should be enjoying this journey because in the future most likely we’ll be sick to each other & I’ll miss the moment where I miss him the most and hoping to spend the night with him.
God, please bless our wedding to be beyond my dream & also our marriage to last forever.



People said, environment is the most important thing on workplace.
I miss to be in a positive environment, supportive & friendly.
I miss to be accepted as the way I am and not to be in a peer pressure.
I hope my new place will be like above.. God may bless me 🙂


It has been ages since I posted all my burden in this blog. I guess I forgot that human need to tell stories.. to anyone.

My head feels like spinning and spinning.. and my first verdict is.. because I don’t like my job. I don’t like the amount of massive presentations I need to deal with..

But can I really find what I like? I guess am just too afraid.. :((

a year ago..

a year ago, the same Easter.. I was in France, and I didn’t even think going to the church, because I don’t understand what the Pastor said. During 10 months there, I only went to church about 2-3 times to really pray.. while the rest are only visiting the church for sightseeing.

It is quite ironic that my biggest dream has -apparently, makes me far from God. It is God who allows me to reach that dream, but apparently it makes me far-faraway from him. I think that’s why He sent me back here 🙂

5 months before D day!

Oh my God, it’s 5 months from now..!
And the very best “surprise” comes on this period: we don’t even know where we’re gonna live.

We had think of few options, but I’m still over think everything, so me!

Now I just realized, who’s gonna do the laundry? dishes? cleaning the house? Aha! Never think of that before 😦