Moi.. maintenant :)

I’m so happy and thrilled for my next semester, because it seemed the journey will me even more exciting than the 1st semester! Our subject seemed more interesting and our lecturer as well, haha..

Despite of my dilemma to do thesis or going back to Indonesia, I am trying not to think of that.. even though I’m confused because people in my class seemed having no direction on where they will be in the next 2 months.. KIDS, LOL..

Adding to that, I’m also super excited of my plan and BF.. okay this is not exactly how things should go, but c’mon I can’t get apple and orange in the same time! It is fact that I have been leaving him for a looong time, and now I expect him to feel “the time is right” and bend on his knee? Well it ain’t gonna happened.

First, because he’s not that kind of guy (not romantic and thoughtful, but it’s ok…)

Second, because he needs a long time and intensive relationship before he’s eager to do that (helloooo.. remember how long did you wait for him to officially asked you to be his GF? ages!).

That’s why, it is beesssttt to have those romantic scene where I will be surprised of his question and big diamond (LOL, when he read this, he must think about this very hard.. I’m kidding honey!), but here we are..

I know what I want, and I ain’t gonna losin’ it again!

So, am sooo excited of the beginning of our preparation!

J’enerve.. j’aime 🙂

and I miss Indonesia too.. sigh..


Okay, it took me more than a week to finally post my Italy trip! Of course the trip has been AWEsome, mostly because I’m with my beloved boyfriend! We haven’t met for 3 months, so the first meeting has been tremendously emotional 😛

We met at Paris Montparnasse station, then we go around Louvre museum (Musse du Louvre -in French) until the evening where we caught our airplane at Orly airport in the south of Paris. Be careful guys, for Orly airport the transportation was a bit tricky. I bought an unlimited weekend pass for 7.50 EUR per person because I thought it applied for Orly as well, since it applied for Charles De Gaulle airport (the main airport in Paris) but I was so shocked when we stucked at ORLY VAL interchange! Apparently our weekend pass was not allowed by the machine and we need to buy another ticket for around 12 EUR! Oh My God, it’s a total disaster!

Anyway, we went with easyjet, I bought the ticket since 3 months ago for around 50 EUR per person. Since easyjet and most of the budget airline in Europe only allowed one hand carry per person (if you don’t buy the baggage space), so we need to push everything inside our cabin luggage. My BF was kinda pissed because he went all the way from Indonesia and he can only bring 1 small luggage, LOL!

After approx. 1 hour on air, we finally arrived at Pisa international airport. As I knew before, Pisa airport is very small, yet it’s super convenient for tourists because we only need 15 minutes to go to the city center (even to Pisa tower). But since my hostel was nearby the airport, I need to find a way either by walking or shuttle bus to the airport parking lot. Me and my BF had little fight because it was late and we seen no shuttle bus operated around the airport! And I just knew that Italian service quality was so bad, they said there was a bus outside the airport, but we found none! Later we realized that they have no idea what we’re asking for, because they were talking about the bus to city center. OMG, I thought no country has customer service quality worse than France!

In short, I decided to walk and drag my luggage by following the arrows to the parking lot. After 15-20 minutes walk we finally arrived at B&B Cariola, which seemed kinda scary, LOL. But apparently it was very nice and we had a nice rest there. In the morning, we went to Pisa tower easily from the airport with paying only around 1.2 EUR!


There is no justice in my country..

but, sadly I still need to go back to a country that I don’t love..

Because someone I loved is there, and he loved to live in a jammed, flooding all the time, and one of the most polluted city in the world: Jakarta.

I just read story about Munir again, he’s the hero of human rights in Indonesia and 8 years ago he was killed by Indonesia’s elite military.. but until now justice hasn’t come yet. I heard sooo many stories where someone killed because they speak out loud about the crime happening in Indonesia, but after that something bad will happen.. either they’re killed, gone, or got into jail because of something they didn’t do.

So scary, really.

People knows in China there’s a lot of secret, terror, and you can’t speak for free.. but people thought Indonesia was okay, we’re a democratic country.. yet the fact is.. ZERO! we’re just as bad as another country, where money can buy law, justice, and souls..


I hope I can still be with you without going back to my country. I don’t wanna spend my life complaining about the land I lived.. I hope.

linear regression

half an hour ago, I’m trying to focus on logistic study for Tuesday’s exam, but I were having brain freeze.. I’ve been procrastinating since last week (when I said I don’t have anything to do, instead I have tons to do.. the projects and exams..) but now I don’t have more time! I need to study NOW!

Yeah, so I did 1 small exercise, and it’s not that bad.. except the stupid calculator which made me so angry, why do I need to press shift all the time?? But after that I need a break, haha.. I feel so old.. and now I’m thinking to sleep.. Oh My God fortunately I don’t have so many exams, imagine my friends who has almost 10 exams! I’m too old for this..

I remember I begged to go back to school when I was working.. because I hate politics and maybe I just wanna run.. But now, I wanna run from here too! from the fact that I need to squeeze my brain again.. But I need to finish this, I’m old means I’m an adult, so no more running from reality!


Lately I’m so sad to accept the reality that I might need to go back to my country to do internship.. or doing a thesis here. Both are not very good options for me, because it’s about pride and how boring a thesis is..

I’m so confused..

But I already chosen to move my ass here, so I need to face the reality, that sometimes reality doesn’t go as you wish..


Indonesian, and I think mostly all Asian is crazy about European style.. They hunt European fancy restaurant, French brasserie, Rustic cafe, etc. They wrote review about how great it is, cozy, cool, romantic, even though they need to pay millions!

But after I lived in Europe, now for me it’s not so special anymore. Brasserie is everywhere, I even forced to eat in a rustic creperie place even though I don’t want to, cause that’s all they have! LOL..

In here, government preserve the old and historical buildings, nonetheless it’s usually located in the city center. That’s why people use it for restaurant or other stores, with a very small space. Even sometimes for me it’s so difficult just to find the toilet.

It’s true that we always want something we don’t want..

In here, I’m dying to taste Indonesian foods.. mie ayam on the street with stinky sauce but taste like heaven, any gudeg Jogya is good for me now, rujak.. Oh my.. And I’m sure all these western people would be glad to taste Asian foods 🙂

I think there’s so many Asian foods in Paris with a long queue..

And above all, I don’t want to pay a fortune just to put my picture on the blog or facebook that I’ve ate on that expensive rustic restaurant! 

It’s ironic that it takes me to live here to realize how many fortune Jakarta’s people spend every month just to dine-out while you can have perfect dinner with your family at home..

l’homme de ma vie..

when he’s sick, I wish I can hug and wipe his cold sweat.
when he went for eye surgery, I wish I can be there for him.
When he sleep, I wish I can give him comfort..
I’m a big girl and I know the risk of my decision of going so faraway from him..
Couldn’t do any of those above.